Alright, it took me two full days to first decipher my notes from the secret interview with my sister and then figure out what they meant. Cause while they seemed to make perfect sense at the time it wasn’t so clear what they really stood for a few hours later. You don’t know my sister yet so here are two things you should know before reading this post:
1.) She likes to monologue. Honestly, this girl can talk without breathing.
2.) She’s a physical person. Which means this was probably a lot funnier standing in front of her watching her “acting” it all out and making wierd faces.
Now let’s start with the first edition of Soul and sister chatting it up!
sister: OMG, hilarious! We had that older woman sitting behind us and she completely freaked out during the proposal scene and started shouting stuff like “Come on, take him! Say yes!” Crazy! She was way too old to do stuff like that!
Soul: Haha, I’m so glad our mum would never do stuff like that! I would DIE of 2nd-hand-embarrassment!
sister: Yeah, and it got even worse! Then there was the Jacob scene and she shouted “Decide now! Take him! FInally take SOMEONE!” I mean hello? She didn’t care which one Bella takes as long as she takes anyone? How does that make sense? And then worse again! Jacob comes into the tent and takes off his shirt and I hear her say “See Bert, THAT is how it’s supposed to look!” and I turn around and see she has BROUGHT HER HUSBAND! WTF? That’s the number one rule. Never bring your husband or boyfriend to a Twilight movie. She’s lucky if he doesn’t want a divorce now. I could so understand him if he does! That woman was crazy like woah!
Soul: You’re right, he SHOULD get a divorce! Poor guy… So how was the movie though?
sister: It was good. Some passages were weird though. Like the campfire scene with the wolves. It felt like the just rushed through it to get to the parts they needed Billy to talk about and that was it. Didn’t feel as if they were chillin and hanging out having a nice campfire barbeque at all. Plus Kristen Stewart? That girl can’t act! All she does is doing puppy eyes the whole damn movie long. And trying to touch her hair and then pulling her hand back last minute. Why is that? Does that make any sense?
Soul: Well, that might be because she has to wear that shitty wig. But I agree, I’m not impressed by her acting either.
sister: Yeah, she sucks! I wish they would kick her out and take that girl from the Vampire Diaries!
See, that alone is proof that this girl is my sister! I swear I never influenced her when it comes to Twilight but still she doesn’t like KStew as Bella. Just like me. Awesome! Plus that cougar sitting behind her in the theater? I really pity her husband! My sister got that one right! Never bring your boyfriend / husband to a Twilight movie. Ever. Cause he will either think you’re a crazy Twihard or that you want him to use glitter bodylotion. And you don’t want him to think either one of this, trust me!
Off to secretly interview the Soul sister about why she like the Vampire Diaries girl better (SPOILER: probably for the same reasons that I like Nina Dobrev better as well)
So now you finally met the Soul sister. How did you like her review? Do you agree? Any other thoughts? And how crazy was that woman sitting behind her on a 1 to 10 scale? Leave a comment or e-mail us!