Eclipse red carpet: The Highs and Lows

Hi there everyone! Did you miss me? Probably not. Honestly, I didn’t publish a proper post yesterday plus I’m almost twelve hours late today. I had a really bad conscience feeling like I had kinda walked out on you all but then I logged in and saw… THAT WE HAD THE MOST VISITORS WE EVER HAD! Seriously? I get rewarded for being MIA? Until yesterday the day that I posted the secret forbidden Eclipse stills was the one where we got the most hits. But then our numbers today beat that BY FAR. So I decided… to stop blogging for two weeks because following the statistics that would mean 1 000 readers more. Haha, just kidding. Climb off that skyscraper again and do NOT jump off it! Just kidding. Here comes your well deserved red carpet recap!

Cutest family of the day award: The Pattinsons

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Cutest couple of the day award: Peter Facinelli and his wife Jennie Garth

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Un-cutest couple of the day award: Nikki Reed and Elizabeth Reaser

So Liz and Nikki wore… basically nothing. It’s not as obvious in this pic than in most of the others but Elizabeth’s dress was completely see-through. I nicknamed it the “naked dress”. Well, wearing that sure is ONE way to get attention. I would say Nikki’s made her look like a swan only swans are breathtakingly elegant and majestic and Nikki is… not.

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Random pics of (sometimes not so) pretty dresses

So, I don’t know about you but as far as I’m concerned Anna and Bryce WIN! I love Dakota’s dress as well only she’s always so pale that overall it makes her seem kinda colorless. Dress is awesome, but I would have loved if she had worn a little color. Sorry for the crappy pic of Kristen’s dress but it was the only one where you could see the backline. Ashley Greene had one of her fashion fail moments and showed up in a toga that could well have covered it all up had she been 4 months pregnant. Just saying. Also, to say this hurts my heart, but for me worst dressed of the evening was Stephenie Meyer. By far. I know she can’t compete with all those skinny Hollywood girls but still… come on! I have seen her in everyday clothes and she’s always so well dressed then. But this burgundy thing kinda reminded me of those medieval markets where people wear costumes. No idea why. Next time Steph, just wear your slightly elegant everyday attire and you’ll look great!

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Random pics involving hot guys

oooooo Kellan WINS! What a classic, elegant outfit! Matched his new dark hair so well! Also (and I know Zelda will love to hear that and love me so much more) I gotta admit I really like Jackson’s outfit. The feathery thing looks like something I would wear in my hair but still in contrary to his MTV Movie Awards aqua jacket, this is a HUGE improvement! I can’t say I hated Rob’s look, not at all. Standing between all those black and grey wearing guys he… stuck out. While all on his own or with Stewie it looked fine. But to be honest, that burgundy suit made me think of Las Vegas weddings EVERY SINGLE TIME…

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Random thought concerning the red carpet

No idea if that occurred to someone else beside myself but Kristen wore a white dress. You know what that means, right? TONS of brand new “Rob and Kristen engaged – the fairytale wedding” pictures. I bet THIS is going to be their engagement pic!

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Personal highlight of the day: Nikki gets pissed off

I know this is a Rob interview. And I know this is hard. But please just completely ignore Rob for a moment. I promise you will get rewarded! Click play and then look at Nikki Reed and Nikki Reed only during the first 15 seconds. Bahaha, how hilarious is it that Rob’s bodyguard told her to back off and she pulled the ultimate bitchface live on the Eclipse red carpet! Awesome!

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Off to check if we lose visitors now that I’m back in action

Soul

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Did you watch the Eclipse red carpet premiere via live stream? Where you there to witness it all in person? What were your personal highlights and lowlights? Let us know! Leave a comment or e-mail us!

(images: Twitter, gettyimages, Twifans)

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Rob at the Ellen Show aka I wanna play Patting Pattinson

Just in case you missed it (Honestly, where are you living?) Rob was at Ellen! I love Ellen. Not in a lesbian way. I mean, I just love the way she interviews all the guests at her show and all the funny stuff she comes up with.So now watch as she makes Rob admit he took ballet lessons when he was a kid. Now I’ll never get the pic of Rob in a leotard out of my head… Hey Rob, did you know I had ten years of ballet lessons? (Nope, this is not a joke!) We could dance together! As long as you promise NOT to wear a leotard… Also Ellen is probably the only person in the world that can get away with saying stuff like “I wish I was… involved in your… career” without making me think that’s a subtle hint that what she really wants is to be involved with some other part than just his career!

In other news Ellen invented the new super awesome party game Patting Pattinson. Wanna see Rob in silk robe? Wanna see an Australian flight attended feeling Rob up and down? NO? Are you crazy? WATCH IT!

I do feel a little 2nd-hand-embarrassed for that girl. But I also envy her. I mean, she got tickets to the Eclipse premiere even though she didn’t guess which one was Rob…

Oh, and just in case you missed that (not that bad if you did) Nikki Reed was at Ellen the day before Rob and they showed the famous Rosalie and Bella scene.

I gotta admit I don’t really like Nikki Reed. (What a surprise…) And I don’t really like Rosalie. But this scene is AWESOME! That’s exactly how I imagined Rosalie when I read the book. The “I don’t particularly like you but…” line is BRILLIANT! I didn’t look forward to that scene. At all. Now I somehow do. So, is it July yet?

Ellen, you chose Nikki Reed as your BBFF? Honestly? Why? I mean, I could have been your Best Brunette Friend Forever! So think about it again and then give me a call! I guess you already got the feeling that this was a mistake. Why else would you have hesitated to put the necklace on? I forgive you though. It was Nikki’s birthday after all and you were just trying to be nice. Also Nikki, don’t pretend you don’t have a pole in your own living room! We all KNOW you’re THAT kind of party girl! For everyone else: If you haven’t seen the Ellen video where she visits Paris, go and watch it RIGHT NOW! Cause there is no way you would wanna miss Ellen’s super rad stripper moves on that pole. Trust me!

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Off to play Patting Pattinson

Soul

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Any thoughts on Rob on Ellen? Do you want to play Patting Pattinson as well? And what about the Rosalie scene? Does Nikki rock that or does she rock that? Leave a comment or e-mail us!

(videos: Youtube)

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We interrupt this Twi-News for a little drama…

I got the slight feeling that no one will really pay attention to what I blog about as long as I haven’t addressed the latest drama. Aka Rob’s new haircut that he got for his role as Jacob (yep, that IS kinda ironic) in Water for Elephants. So I came up with a pretty brilliant idea if I do say so myself. Instead of a minute’s silence I give you… a minute’s freak-out. Here are the rules for that! Click THIS (<– Honestly, CLICK IT!) and press the play button. Count back from 60. That’s how long you got to completely lose your shit and freak out like crazy. Because of Rob’s new haircut. Then we’ll all say together one last time “RIP sex-hair” while we keep in mind that it will grow back to its old glory and awesomeness in just a few weeks time and calm down. Done? Awesome! Now to the real post!

I know I still got to post about the MTV movie awards, which I will do the week before they actually take place. And yes, I’m also aware that I still got to blog about the Eclipse soundtrack. But since most of the songs aren’t out yet I will delay that a little longer so that when I finally get to hear them all I can tell you about my guesses as to which scene they will combine with which one of the songs. Because I’m sure that will make the post way better than just inserting videos of random Sia and Florence and the Machine etc videos here. So what am I going to post about today you might ask. Uhm yep, I thought it was time for a little Twi-News round-up again!

A couple of days ago Ashley Greene and Nikki Reed won a Young Hollywood Award plus Peter Facinelli was there to present one of the awards. Doesn’t sound that exciting? Well, look at the pics then!

Okay, I think we can all agree that Peter looks pretty good here! But the girls? WTF? Nikki’s dress seems to be rather standard in the pic of the three of them together. But then zoom in on the one where she holds her award! THIS reminds me of a sack. A glittering sack consisting of 90% cleavage only, that is. And Ashley? Is this dress SUPPOSED to look as if her underwear is the main part of her evening attire? She even tweeted about taking the metro to get to the award show. Uhm, I bet everyone else there thought she was some kind of high class prostitute. Sorry to say… Ashley and Nikki are both really beautiful girls, but those dresses were just… FAIL. The only girl looking really awesome and decently dressed yet sexy here is Nina Dobrev. And she is from The Vampire Diaries and NOT Twilight. Think about THAT!

In other news, there are new outtakes from a photoshoot Kellan did. Most of the time he looks hot like this:

In others he’s got that boyish playful “I just ate the whole water-melon without getting caught” grin:

Then there are sexy but also kinda strange pics. Like this one that makes me wonder if he’d need an A or rather a B-cup for his man-boobs:

And then there were the one’s that made me speechless. No, I don’t mean this in a “I was so stunned by his beauty I couldn’t breathe anymore” way. It’s rather that I got the impression the photographer saw all those vids of Taylor Lautner doing that crazy martial arts tricks and got carried away. Alas Kellan Lutz is super sporty except that he can’t do backflips. So it ended up in a weird “can you make half vertical push-ups on that wall right there?” pose. WTF?

Honestly Kellan, the next time the photographer asks something strange like that, just say no! Or go for handstand push-ups instead. I’m sure you can do a handstand. Against a wall at least! Cause you ARE sporty and athletic. I mean, I saw all those muscles in the pic with the punching bag… Plus handstand push-ups look less weird and waaayyy sexier than this. Plus I’m a gymnast and would pretend you did them for me. And that would RULE! Kthxbye!

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Off to push the drama button once more (Honestly, that button is AWESOME!)

Soul

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So what are your thoughts? How do you like the Twi-girls’ dresses? And the Kellan pics? Do you want him to rather do handstand push-ups the next time just as much as I do? Are you addicted to the drama button yet? Let me know! Leave a comment or e-mail us!

(images: Twifans)

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Why the hardcore Robstens never fail to cheer me up

Almost every day there are new reports of Rob holding hands with Kristen / not holding hands with Kristen / secretly sharing a hotel room / whatever. And it’s nothing new that a huge part of the fandom is divided into pro-Rob-and-Kristeners (Robstens for short) and anti-Rob-and-Kristeners (Nonstens). As far as I’m concerned, I don’t really care who Rob is with. As long as he isn’t with me, it’s not really important who else he’s with. Cause let’s be honest, does it really matter if at the end of the day he has awesome mindblowing sex shares his Hot Pocket with Kristen, Ashley Greene, Nikki Reed Or Cathy Hardi? I don’t really care. Okay, maybe I would care if it was Cathy Hardi. Or Heidi Montag. Cause that would just be plain wrong in so many kinda ways. But as long as it’s a mostly normal young lady? I’m fine with it! Okay, I’m still convinced he could do way better with ME but whatever…

Alas there are others out there who do NOT take it as easy as I do. A few days ago I read a post where some of the Robstens went really crazy and said stuff like “those Nonstens are fat, ugly women who finally need to stop hating on Kristen and get a life”. And I was like woah, those chicks are mean! I used to be a Nonsten myself. I neither consider myself fat nor ugly. Okay, maybe I don’t have a life seeing that I managed to run this Twilight-Blog for over six months but otherwise… So I searched Google Images for Robsten pics. And guess who obviously DOESN’T have a life of their own? Yep, those very same crazy Robstens I mentioned above. Also, if you’re one of the normal Robstens simply thinking that Rob and Kristen would make a cute couple, please don’t feel offended! I only mean the crazy Robsten worshippers here! So look what they do in their free time:

They make photoshop manips of Rob and Kristen making out at the beach plus Rob sneakily attempting a boob grab in the middle of a photoshoot.

They take boob-ogling Rob out of that first pic and insert him in a pic where he now ogles… Kristen’s hoodie!? Hm, whatever…

They risk permanent eye damage in the attempt to prove that somewhere behind these tinted glasses there is actually Rob standing next to Kristen but at the same time completely forget what the real question is: Who belongs to that scary hand with tons of rings and that Matrix-style leather coat on the right???

They analize the holes in Rob’s shirt to prove that Kristen is wearing one of his shirts from time to time. Okay, they are absolutely right when it comes to this… she IS wearing Rob’s shirt here!

They probably act out this very scene from Rob and Kristen at a Kings of Leon concert to prove that they were holding hands here because this exact combination of entwined fingers is only possible if you are holding hands with the love of your life, obviously. (Honestly, how can they tell a pinkie and a thumb apart on that crappy quality pic?)

They look at pictures of Rob and Kristen coming back from the Eclipse re-shoots in Vancouver and pay enough attention to all the details to realize that green bag that belongs to Kristen but that Rob carried for her.

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Damn, who needs to get a life now?

Soul

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I’ll say it again: If you are a NORMAL Robsten or Nonsten please don’t feel offended! I just read that really mean article somewhere and thought I had to share all of this. So what are your Robsten (or Nonsten) thoughts? Pro? Con? Don’t care as long as Rob is not with you? Who else would you love to see Rob with? Leave a comment or e-mail me!

(images: all found by googling “Robsten”)

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The one that REALLY got me excited – plus what our awesome readers think about the Eclipse trailer

Today it’s finally time for the real Eclipse trailer review. Before I start with my own thoughts, I thought I would share two comments we received here on the blog first, just in case you missed them. Cause they’re hilarious. Trust me! So let’s start with what our lovely reader purple.is.cool had to say:

Something bothers me about the second picture. As if Edward was wearing a wig, too… He looks neither angelic nor like a Greek god to me there. Just an average handsome guy who has been dipped in whitewash. You are right, Bella, it IS time to visit the optometrist.
As for Edward’s speech problems, that was RPattz trying to sound all honey and velvet, girls…

Dear purple.is.cool, THIS is how Edward looks with a wig...

No, purple.is.cool, Edward isn’t wearing a wig. That’s just his special meadow sex hair! But to be honest, I liked his Twilight look best. That was the hottest Edward for me. I gotta give you that, Cathy Hardi… Still, I think all in all Eclipse Edward looks better than New Moon Edward. Even though technically he should look exactly the same in every movie cause you know, he’s a vampire and stuff. As for Edward’s honey and velvet voice, I hope this is not it. Cause this is not how Rob’s sexy voice sounds in my numerous dreams where I make out with him in my imagination. Nevertheless I fear that purple.is.cool might be right there…

Let’s hear what the lovely Dot has to say!

I thought that I was the only one who noticed that Jacobs abs are gone… Are they on a vacation or what? Maybe Taylor thought that since Kristen’s wearing a real ugly wig no one will notice his little “beer belly”. I know that I’m probably complaining but I’m not to impressed with this trailer and I hope they will release another version of it.

Haha, the thought that the very shiteous Bella wig might be more captivating than Taylor’s abs really cracks me up. The day that this becomes true is a really sad day for the whole Twidom… but a very funny one at the same time. At least for me. Cause I can turn ANYTHING into a huge joke, obviously.

So now about my own opinion: To be honest I’m so with Dot here. I was not too impressed by it. Somehow the first ever New Moon trailer got me WAY more excited than this one for Eclipse did. I mean, there were a few good parts in it but all in all it was a little lame. Sorry to say! But then I found this gem:

Uhm hello? THIS is how the trailer should have been! This video is barely longer than the trailer but oh just so much better! All the Cullens look AMAZING! So much hotter than I’m used to… And the Victoria green screen stunt scene is awesome. I mean I still wish that was Rachelle flying and jumping around there but nevertheless it seems so cool in a fancy action kinda way. And then the fight scenes! Trees flying around? A bunch of shirtless jorts-wearing Indian boys showing their abs plus the Cullens looking absolutely their BEST. This might be the first time that I really love the Rosalie hair. THIS really got me excited for Eclipse! I guess that’s the reason why I already watched it 18 times by the time I write this post. Just kidding. Or maybe not.

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Can June come soon, please? Like… NOW?

Soul

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PS: Thanks purple.is.cool and Dot for letting me use your awesome comments and for just hanging around here on the blog! Your comments always crack me up!

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So what was your impression of the first Eclipse trailer? And how do you like the sneak peek? Do you think that it’s way better, just like me? Which ones were your favorite parts? And did you laugh your asses of at Dot’s and purple.is.cool’s comments? Cause I’m sure I did! So whatever it is, leave a comment or e-mail me! I might even feature you in a future post, you never know…

(video: YouTube; image: Google)

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How to dazzle everyone with funny Monday stuff Vol. 7

I hope 7 is right cause to be honest I’ve lost count. But for now it doesn’t matter so let’s just pretend Vol.7 is correct… No, I have not forgotten that it’s MLK and most of you won’t have to work today. I considered doing funny Tuesday stuff again (this time not because I forgot but on purpose) but then I thought of all the people who are not living in the US or have a job where they have to work no matter if it’s MLK or any other day of the year. And of myself. Cause I have to go to work as well… and I need a laugh to start off this week! But because it’s still some kind of special occasion I prepared a post that’s at least a bit different from what I usually do. So here we go…

Yeah, of course every other guy doing the same would be a total freak. But Edward pulls all that stuff off so nicely he gets away with it. Absolutely justified!

Oh yes, sometimes I miss the O.C. All those laughs and dorky Seth and Ryan always getting into trouble… Ah, the good old days. Plus that picture really kind of reminds me of the O.C. Can someone please photoshop the Cohen’s and Marissa’s ans Summer’s heads on? Just for fun, you know…

Have I mentioned I never really watched Goblet of Fire completely? Only ever parts of it. Can’t really tell why but it’s true.

Yay, this one really tops it off! It’s the one picture that can always cheer me up when I’m feeling bad cause it makes me think that I would never ever look this bad while at work. Well, at least that’s what I keep telling myself… Plus it portrays the KStew in my head so unbelievably well.

So that’s it, the MLK edition of funny Monday stuff for the first time ever NOT featuring Polyvore pictures. Guess I’m heading off to work now. Enjoy your day off everyone who’s lucky enough to sleep late and stay at home today!

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Off to regret that I’m not living in the US once more

Saveyoursoul

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Any funny Twi-related pictures you want to share with us? Do you miss the O.C. as well? Can you photoshop those heads on the pic for me? Do you think I should finally watch Goblet of Fire completely? Do you heart KStew and Nikki Reed’s faces on that photo as much as I do? Leave a comment or e-mail us!

(pictures: google)

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Happy New Year everyone here at HTD!

Before you do anything else (like reading on) press play on the video below to listen to the ultimate New Year’s song to get you into the right mood!

Okay, now we can go on! You know, holidays and stuff always mean we’re being kind of lazy. Yeah, sorry! Nevertheless we made this fantabulous New Year’s card for you to enjoy! Unfortunately Cam refused to wear one of our amazingly beautiful party hats… See how Rob embraces me? And how Zelda is standing right behind him so she can make a good butt grab? Yes, we’re cool like that

Don’t know if you noticed, but that’s us and the Twilight gang at Isle Esme. Cause that’s where we’re gonna spend New Year’s Eve. So I guess you’ll understand that we’re kind of MIA today. And maybe tomorrow, depending on how much Champagne Carlisle put into the fridge for us… So join you family and friends and let’s ring in the New Year with a bang! And then when everyone’s sober again come back and check what we got for you here at HTD. Cause we’re planning awesome stuff for 2010!

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Off to enjoy my Isle Esme time

Saveyoursoul

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So how are you gonna spend New Year’s Eve? Envy us? Want us to invite you next time? No problem! Whatever it is, leave a comment or e-mail us!

(video: YouTube; image: google, modified by me; took me three hours to make the first one cause I’m not such a pro at photoshop… yet. Then the damn program went down and I had to start all over again. Crap! Well, the second one turned out pretty cool so whatever…)

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Zelda and Soul’s Christmas wish list

Actually this post was supposed to be about what Zelda and I wanted to get the Twilight cast for Christmas. But then I thought hey, we’re already giving them all our free-time, at least half of our thoughts and we run a whole blog dedicated to them (Okay, and everything else Twi-related but whatever…). So shouldn’t they give us a present for Christmas? Cause I think that would be a really nice way to show us their appreciation of all our endless swooning hard work. Honestly, they didn’t do that much since New Moon came out and sometimes it’s pretty hard to find something to write about everyday. So dear cast members in case you stumble about this post, here’s Zelda’s and my Christmas wish list for you:

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Is this Kellans Chippendales revival for Zelda and me??

Kellan: Get out your old Chippendales outfit. You know which one I mean. No? Okay, I’ll just post a picture of it again to stir your memory a bit…
Then round up the other members and make a special supersexy Twilight performance including a lot of glitter all over your body. Oh, and send over two VIP-tickets for Zelda and me, please!

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Kristen: You can choose one of the following two. Or just combine them I guess…
a) Start hanging out with Lindsay Lohan and become the new party girl. You could become fake lesbians just like you and Nikki Reed were once. Okay, you might have to dress up in the evenings and that doesn’t fit in that well with all your black mullet and plaid style. But let’s be honest! Only reason why people wear plaid at all is because of Rob…

Find the 10 differences! Can't? Me neither...

b) In case you can’t leave the beloved plaid behind, start hanging out again with the Rob double that used to be your boyfriend. You know who I mean, Michael Angarano. The one who looked just like Rob. And probably stole his clothes and the Ray Bans to be more convincing. In case you can’t remember properly, here’s a picture!

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Is this Rob's new BFF?

Rob: Okay, now that we got Kristen out of the way, let’s get to you. Become BFFs with Prince Harry and throw an absolutely fantabulous party at Buckingham Palace. Cause to be honest, even though the Queen might be not amused, Prince Harry knows how to party! You could invite your old Brit-pack friends Tom Stu, Sam Bradley, Marcus Foster and Bobby Long as well. And Zelda and me of course. Just send us over the outfits you’d like us to wear that evening and the two superspecial VIP-tickets with access to your room. We’ll take care of the rest, promise!

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Jackson: Okay, this one’s not for me but for Zelda alone. Could you please dress up as Jasper and meet her? And then show her all your awesome moves? Like that Twilight trick with your huge bat -that’s what she said-? But please be careful. I fear she might get a heart-attack…

Uhm, yes we would...

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Taylor: Uhm, could you just send us two first class flight tickets to Georgia? And a week in a nice little villa? Or in a hotel suite? With you, of course? And soon please, if you don’t mind! Cause it won’t be half as much fun after february 11th when you finally turn 18 and we don’t have to be afraid of Chris Hansen anymore. Oh how we’re gonna miss all the awesome legal in Georgia jail jokes…

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Peter: Make another bet like you did with Rob de Franco, with Chris Weitz this time. Bet to get us How To Dazzle Ladies 5000 readers a day within one week. We know you can do stuff like that. But we don’t want poor Chris Weitz aka everybody’s DILF to have to do a bikini dance. So instead if he loses he has to direct Breaking Dawn. And get Zelda the role of Maria for a hot Maria rewards Jasper scene ifyouknowwhatimsaying. I know Maria has already been casted but hey, they recast Victoria as well although Rachelle did an awesome job… And then cast me as the older version of Renesmee in a Jacob and Renesmee spending their honeymoon on Isle Esme lookout. Chris, we know you can do that. We love you for bringing back our faith after Cathy slaughtered Twilight… Oh, I almost forgot about you, Peter! In the improbable case you should lose, you have to adopt us into the Cullen family. Your Carlisle, the head of the family, so we guess you can decide stuff like that. What? Yeah, we know Carlisle’s only a fictional character. Whatever, we don’t care. Just do it! Thanks!

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Off to send our wish list to Santa

Saveyoursoul

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Love our wish list? Think the Twicast members should give us presents? What is on your wish list? Anything Twi-related? If you had the chance, what would you wish from Rob, Taylor and the rest? Besides the obvious like spending the night with them of course Tell us about all your Christmas wishes in the comments or send an e-mail!

(images: google)

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How to dazzle everyone with the “Dazzling Raspberry”

Yesterday we handed out the How To Dazzle Awards for our favorite things in New Moon. So in order to stay honest, today is the day we present you the “Dazzling Raspberry”, our award for things we did not like that much when seeing New Moon for the first time. Because you got to admit there were a few strange details… Doesn’t mean we didn’t like the movie though. We rated it four out of five Heineken bottles, remember? Okay, here we go!

And the award goes to…

1. Worst make-up: Esme. She looked kind of naturally beautiful in Twilight. This time she looked as is a twelve year old had tried to use eyeliner for the first time. Remember when you wanted to have a thin elegant line and it all ended up being too broad and nothing but an awfully thick black blotch? Yep, that’s what Esme’s make-up reminded me of…

2. Most unsexy scene supposed to be sexy: Edward in the red Volturi cloak. I expected it to look mystical, like a wizard’s or one of the elves’, kind of representing power and magic. Instead we got something that looked very much like either a priest’s robe or Liza Minelli’s bathrobe. None of them very sexy to me, sorry!

3. Worst Rosalie bitch moment: “It’s a necklace. Alice picked it out.” Oh, great. Give someone a present, then immediately say you didn’t buy it yourself and are not the least bit interested if she likes it or not. Exactly what Bella needed for her birthday since she hates getting older anyway. Yeah Rosalie, you can even make people feel bad on their birthday, what an awesome gift!

4. Strangest line: Harry Clearwater saying “My Kung Fu is strong”. He knows about the vampires and werewolves and he knows that Bella knows about the vamps but instead of making a subtle hint about that he goes for “My Kung Fu is strong”. Definitely the new spider-monkey!

5. Worst change in comparison to the book: Hardcore romantic Edward being even sappier than in the books. Unbelievable that this was even possible but Melissa Rosenberg made it happen.

6. Worst outfit: Carlisle’s Volturi outfit. Okay, maybe it was once hip to wear velvet, silk and lace as a man but still… I can’t help myself, it somehow looks gay. Sorry Carlisle!

7. Most unnecessary line: Jane saying “pain” before torturing Edward. Did they think the audience would not get what Jane is doing if she didn’t announce it? I mean, they would realize what happens as soon as Edward starts writhing in agony, right?

8. Worst driver: Edward when he’s parking in the school parking lot on Bella’s birthday taking at least three spots with his new charcoal Volvo (Yeah, he even beat Bella hitting her head while trying to ride a motorcycle). Only reason to justify this? Well, it looks like a really cool Volvo TV spot when he get’s out and walks towards Bella. And to be honest, I don’t really mind. Edward could take as many parking spots as he likes as long as he would walk over to me like that… Just saying.

Zelda's favorite sexy poodle wig

9. Worst wig: Actually I voted for Jasper and his new poodle wig here but Zelda is really into his hair, so the jury aka we chose Rosalie instead. Because it looks so damn unnatural and not at all like real hair. And shouldn’t that be the purpose of wigs in movies? To look as if they were the real hair of actors? Not such a huge success here. Fits in nicely with the blond vain bitch cliché though…

10. Worst scene: The kissing scene on Bella’s birthday in front of her truck. Because this is so not sexy. Edward starts groaning and moaning as if in deep pain and looks like he is about to start crying every second. Simply horrible. I felt kind of 2nd-hand-embarrassed for him and I didn’t think that was possible. Honestly, before he would kiss me like that I’d rather not be kissed by Edward at all. Hard to believe, I know. But true nevertheless. In case it ever comes to this Edward, just so that you know, I want a real kiss! You can do better than that! And I can definitely do better than Bella…  Just saying.

Don’t worry Chris, we liked the movie a lot. We just felt as if we had to mention the not so good parts as well so that you believe us we don’t belong to those hardcore fans loving everything twi-related without really thinking about it. In case you feel depressed now (You shouldn’t!) just read what we posted yesterday again! Cause there was some pretty awesome stuff that made us invent the superspecial How To Dazzle Awards just to appreciate your work. Something we didn’t think that necessary for Cathy Hardi butchering directing Twilight…

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Off to buy a supersexy red cloak for Edward in case he shows up

Saveyoursoul

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Anything we missed? What do you think deserved the Dazzling Raspberry? Leave us a comment or send an e-mail!

(images: Polyvore and google)

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How to dazzle our readers with the New Moon movie review part 1

Zelda and I made it! We finally saw New Moon! Yesterday we went to the premiere here with a couple of friends and Mama Soul. We saw some people wearing Twilight-shirts, a couple of Twimoms and even a Twidad. I didn’t even know they exist until yesterday… And a lot of girls wearing plaid. Coincidence? A subtle tribute to Rob? Who knows? (I do!) Our premiere outfit? A blue blouse just like book-Bella, Ray Bans like Edward and the original Bella-bracelet from Italy (Great story concerning that one, I’ll tell you soon in another post!). So today we’re gonna present you our New Moon review part 1. Part 2 will follow soon… and include a lot more details cause we’re gonna see the movie about 23 more times before writing that. Just in case you haven’t seen the film yet (You better got a good excuse for that!) and want to have the real surprise when watching it for the first time: SPOILER ALARM! Starting now and ending at the end of this post. So here we go:

Taylor Lautner sometimes wears a shirt in New Moon...

First of all, down with Cathy the Cougar! Chris Weitz, do you want to marry me? What an enormous improvement in comparison to Twilight! I’m not going as far as to say it was the perfect movie, but honestly Chris, you’re so down with the kids! Or rather the Twilight-fans. Or Zelda and me. This is how vampires should look when they sparkle! Like diamonds and not that ringing and tinkling in the woods crap. Two minutes into the movie and I already love Charlie so much. How sweet when he almost started to sing, or when he came to look after Bella when she was screaming in her bed. We even got the names of the months after Edward left. Something I had really been hoping for!

... but most of the time doesn't, because he shouldn't!

And the e-mails for Alice idea to show how Bella feels, what an incredibly clever move of you, Chris! And I loved that Harry Clearwater, the king of homemade fish-fry, died as a hero trying to protect Charlie from Victoria. And oh how Rachelle looked awesome with her flaming red hair. Zelda totally liked the cliff diving scene. When Bella first sees Victoria under water and then there’s Edward beside her… epic! And the funny stuff, like the cinema scene or the “You like older women, huh?”. Not exactly as funny as the spider-monkey line but still… And Jasper and Emmett were so much… uhm, cooler, cuter? Whatever, better anyway!

Ok, there were a few things that were kind of strange and I think we got to mention them as well in order to try and stay honest. Sometimes it was a bit too cheesy. Cheesier than the books. I even felt kind of 2nd-hand-embarrassed for Edward being so hardcore romantic. I noticed that Edward’s abs seem to have looked a lot better on the pics from the set we saw a few months ago. In the actual Volterra scene, they were barely visible. So what happened there? I mean, isn’t Edward supposed to have at least a six-pack? Jacob even got an eight-pack, so in comparison to that… sorry to say Rob, but Taylor wins this one!

Caius Malfoy and his Volturi friends

Did anyone else think Marcus and Caius looked like Denethor, Faramir’s dad from Lord of the Rings, and  Draco Malfoy’s older brother? Did the Volturi fight scene between Edward and Demetri remind you of the Gandalf vs. Saruman battle in the LOTR?

And there’s another thing. Not your fault Chris, this is just how Stephenie Meyer wrote Bella and the reason why this girl sometimes annoys the crap out of me in the books: Who do you think you are, Bella “don’t hurt him, kill me instead” Swan? Why should the Volturi treat Edward’s life against yours? You’re nothing but a weak clumsy girl, okay? Sorry to say, but deal with it!

All in all, we got everything we wanted… Well, almost. Taylor Lautner wore a shirt in at least three scenes. BIG FAIL! Sorry Chris… But don’t worry, Zelda and I enjoyed the movie a lot. We’re probably going to watch it over and over again for the next few weeks… Only because of important blog journalism of course so that we can present you a more detailed review soon. Wanna know what Mama Soul said about New Moon? She made so many great hilarious comments that she will get her own post this week. Don’t miss it! There’s no better way to watch this film than sitting in between her and Zelda. We’ve got enough stuff to write about for at least four weeks, so keep coming back to check what else we got in store for you!

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Off to call Zelda and ask her when we’re going to the cinema again

Saveyoursoul

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PS: We rate New Moon 4 out of 5 Heineken bottles

How did you like New Moon? Do you wanna marry Chris Weitz as well? Because I do… Which scenes were your favorites? Could the movie live up to your expectations? Any details or thoughts you want to share? Leave a comment or write an e-mail!

(images: google and me)

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